As I gaze at our hundred-year-old solid oak table, with the scrolled legs and six leaves to accommodate up to twelve loved ones, I see ghosts of Christmas dinners past…. There I am, about eight, with my new baby doll Santa brought. We’re all at Grandma and Grandpa White’s house in Mallard, Iowa – Mom and Dad, Mom’s three sisters and husbands, and a total of twelve of us cousins. Kids are all relegated to the card tables in the living room, within eye shot of the adults at the big dining room table.
From the moment we entered the cozy home, we’ve been enticed by mouth-watering scents – Grandma’s braided Christmas bread and cinnamon rolls (still warm from the oven), turkey, green bean casserole, scalloped corn (some with oysters, yukky!), pineapple salad, potatoes and gravy, and, yes! Aunt Leona brought both apple and pumpkin pies. Grandma must have been exhausted, but all I see is her Mona Lisa smile of serene contentment as she surveys her brood. We are each in our own special place at the table.
Through the years, the White “clan” dwindled. Grandpa died when I was ten. Cousin Curt died in a car wreck when he was just seventeen. Time marched on. When Grandma died at age 101, the table was bequeathed to Mom. Then, a few years back, Mom and Dad went to an assisted living center and I inherited the coveted family table. Seems impossible, but now I’m Grandma! (Sans the cinnamon rolls and homemade pie crust, but proud Grandma to precious three-year-old Ben, nonetheless!)
In a talk he gave at a recent AACC conference, John Ortberg stated that feelings of acceptance and rejection are huge when we consider whether we are welcome at the family table. We build intimacy when we pair nourishing our bodies with nourishing our souls. Jesus and his followers got it. They ate together often, whether on the beach or in upper rooms. And everyone was welcome at their table, from rich young rulers and tax collectors to prostitutes.
Especially at Christmas feasts, we long to know there is a place set at the table with our name on it. We each have a unique presence and function in our family body that no one else can fill. It is at the family holiday table that loved ones of various ages– from disparate worlds geographically, politically, and spiritually– join hands to ask God’s blessing with no agenda except to remind each other, “You are special.” “You are loved.”
We hope you can partake of a Christmas feast with family and loved ones, and if circumstances make that impossible, we pray you know how very much you will be missed. (Yes, Megan, Gary, and Austin, we mean you!)
As a special Merry Christmas to you click on the link below and download your copy of the Red Light Green Light game. It’s something we created to help make family memories for you this year. Print as many copies as you like. Have fun family discussions about strengths you see in each other!
Charlene Giles
